Monthly Archives: January 2014

Afternoon Triple Play Review

I’m a little sluggish on the creative writing side today so here are a few movies I’ve watched recently.

Jonah Hex- 2010

From IMDB:
The U.S. military makes a scarred bounty hunter with warrants on his own head an offer he cannot refuse: in exchange for his freedom, he must stop a terrorist who is ready to unleash Hell on Earth.

I have a soft spot for Westerns. That being said, this movie sucked. It was clunky, it lacked direction, and it felt like everyone just showed up for the check. It could have been good. The only good part of the movie is Josh Brolin. It appears that no one told him that that it was a phone-in.
John Malkovich is my Nic Cage. I love him as the crazy dude in Red, but in this he’s just kind of there. It’s the same deal with Megan Fox. I feel like with the right director she could knock it out, but this just wasn’t it.

Verdict: Save your $1.20 for another Redbox.

The Lone Ranger – 2013
From IMDB:
Native American warrior Tonto recounts the untold tales that transformed John Reid, a man of the law, into a legend of justice.

I went in expecting Captain Jack playing Tonto, but I was pleasantly wrong. Armie Hammer proves he’s got some chops to him and the entire cast was really good. It felt like Johnny Depp was kind of just the nugget to draw in crowds. Tonto is a big part of the movie, and he does have some good parts, but once The Lone Ranger gets his mask it’s Armie Hammer who’s driving the movie. That isn’t a bad thing. The action is madcap slapstick, but I can see why audiences were a little put off. It runs a bit long, and the first third is the origin story.

Verdict: If you want a Johnny Depp movie then get one of the Pirates movies. It’s worth the $1.20 if you’re looking for something a bit different.

R.I.P.D. – 2013
From IMDB:
A recently slain cop joins a team of undead police officers working for the Rest in Peace Department and tries to find the man who murdered him.

Oh, Ryan Reynolds, when will your bad luck streak end? Was this movie good? No, not really. Was it fun? Yes. Have I watched it more than once? Yes, about three.
Kevin Bacon, Jeff Bridges, and Ryan Reynolds are the three main players in the plot and they all do a good job. The FX are a little lacking in a couple spots, but It was a fun movie. It was said to be MIB with the undead. That’s about half-way accurate, there is a lot unsaid about the world around the story, but I wouldn’t mind seeing a sequel or TV show to flesh it out.

Verdict: Good to slay a bucket of popcorn. Redbox it.


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